thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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