did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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