Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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