I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
