somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
