...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Moan for me like Helen Keller
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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