I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Randomize
