i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
