kristin has been a bad kristin
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
