so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
