there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Randomize
