It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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