There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
My vagina is very pro this idea
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