dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
