I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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