its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
We left an ass print on the piano.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Randomize
