Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
