On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
