My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
so let's talk penis.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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