Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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