my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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