So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
