We're like a lot better than the average bears
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
