Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
