My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Randomize
