a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
