? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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