If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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