I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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