glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
