that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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