Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I have aggressive nipples.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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