i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
