if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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