when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
