I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
