and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
