i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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