it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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