Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
