Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
