I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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