My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
