found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
only if we run a train.
done.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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