So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize