He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
