a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
