Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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