So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
