so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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