i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize